Becoming the "Have's"

I have noticed that there are 2 types of thrifty folks and 2 types of downsizers.  The first group is the Have-Not's.  They don't have enough money, so they downsize, or tighten the budget, or what have you.  They are frequently heard talking about what they will do when... their husband gets a better-paying job, the market turns around, the kids graduate from college.  It is obviously a painful place to be.  It feels like deprivation and it isn't any fun.  And yes, we've been there.  The Master of the Red House lost his job 11 months after we got married and 1 month before the first Little Blockbuilder was born.  On the day he was supposed to be getting a substantial raise.  Were we prepared?  I should say not.  I came across The Tightwad Gazette back then but it didn't help me much.  I didn't get it.  Life was tough, bills piled up, and only the grace of God and the excellent financial skills of my husband kept us from utter financial ruin.  (Can you say "zero percent on balance transfers for 6 months???") 

Then there is the other group of thrifty folk who choose to be frugal or downsize or live lightly.  For these people, frugality is... fun?  OK, maybe not always but it is always a positive challenge.  A game.  There are fewer shades of self-pity involved in the scrimping and pinching.  "How low can you go?" really does get fun at times for these people.  These folks don't daydream about spending money "if they had it."    They might be very wealthy or very poor, but rarely feel sorry for themselves.  They are the Have's.  They have everything they need, most of what they want.  In the kingdom of tightwaddery, they are kings.

I suppose there was a turning point when we entered the latter group from the former but I'm not sure when it came to pass.  I suppose we do owe the old place some credit for it, though.  Along the way we saw our meager savings repeatedly eaten up by The Red House and we challenged ourselves to feed her growing appetite for disposable income while managing to keep a few dollars tucked away.  As the years passed there was the Grocery Challenge and the Thrift Store Challenge and the Thermostat Challenge- that was a good one.  How many degrees can we turn it down with the  constant wearing of full suits of long underwear?  On days like this:

only about 2. 

We were gaining skills in living below our means.  Developing habits that we knew we needed in order to raise a large brood of Little Blockbuilders in The Red Monster.

But as we went, something dreadful was happening below the surface.  The relationship we had with her, even on the part of The Master, was changing. 

We were falling out of love with The Red House.